Peace Talk Mediation Cards
Restorative Toolkit Grade 4 Peer Mediation
Peace Talk Mediation Cards
Deck 1 • Discovery & Listening Cards 1–4 of 8
Card 1 • The Agreement
The Golden Rules of Peace Talk
Both students read and agree before we begin.
1
Take turns speaking: No interrupting or rolling eyes when the other girl shares.
2
Fix the problem, not each other: Focus on finding peace, not winning an argument.
3
Keep it here: What is said in mediation stays here. No post-talk gossip.
4
Use "I" words: Talk about your own feelings instead of accusing words like "You always..."
We both commit: Initial: Student A: ___ • Student B: ___
Card 2 • Share Feelings
My Story & My Heart
Hold this card when it is your turn to speak.
Calm-Down Starter:
Take one slow, deep belly breath. Speak in a calm voice so she can truly hear your words.
Sentence Stem 1 • What Happened:
"When..." (state the clear fact without name-calling)
Sentence Stem 2 • How It Felt:
"I felt..." (name your real emotion from Card 3)
Sentence Stem 3 • The Core Need:
"Because what I really needed was..." (honesty, inclusion, space)
Pass this card when you have finished sharing your thoughts.
Card 3 • Emotion Bank
Feelings & Underlying Needs
Look beyond just "mad"—find the truest word.
When feelings get hurt:
Left Out Embarrassed Betrayed Ignored Jealous Misunderstood Worried Unimportant
What my heart was actually needing:
To be included A true friend Fairness Honesty Respect & Privacy Gentle Words Quiet space
Tip for Mediator: Ask, "Which of these words best describes the sting inside?"
Card 4 • Listen & Reflect
The Mirror: Reflecting Her Words
Before you respond, show her you truly heard.
Remember: Listening doesn't mean you agree with everything. It means you respect her enough to hear her story.
Step 1 • Paraphrase:
"What I heard you say is that when I..."
"You felt..."
Step 2 • Check for Accuracy:
"Did I understand you right, or did I miss something important?"
Wait for her nod or clarification before moving forward.
Print on heavy cardstock, cut along dashed borders, and punch top-left for a ring binder. Page 1 of 2
Restorative Toolkit Grade 4 Peer Mediation
Repairing Harm & Planning Ahead
Deck 2 • Action & Healing Cards 5–8 of 8
Card 5 • Responsibility
Owning My Piece of the Puzzle
Both girls answer: "What part belongs to me?"
1. The Choice I Made:
"A choice I made that hurt you or made this fight bigger was..."
(gossiping, excluding, reacting angrily, mocking)
2. Seeing the Impact:
"I now see that my actions made you feel..."
3. A Better Way:
"What I wish I had done instead was..."
Owning your mistake takes real courage and rebuilds trust immediately.
Card 6 • Genuine Repair
The 4-Part Meaningful Apology
Real apologies don't use the word "if" or "but".
Part 1 • Name the Action:
"I am sorry for [specific thing I said or did]."
Part 2 • Acknowledge the Hurt:
"It was wrong because it made you feel [emotion]."
Part 3 • Promise for Tomorrow:
"In the future, I promise that I will [new action]."
Part 4 • Ask to Repair:
"How can I help make things right between us today?"
Wait for her response: "I accept your apology" or "Thank you for hearing me."
Card 7 • Next Steps
The Peace Pact: Daily Actions
Agree on concrete behaviors for school tomorrow.
Recess & Lunch Plan:
Friendly wave & play together Calm, respectful space for a few days
Friend Group Agreement:
We will not ask friends to pick sides, gossip at lockers, or form groups against each other.
Our Shared Commitment:
You do not have to be best friends, but we must treat each other with dignity.
Card 8 • Safety Valve
The Reset Button
What to do if feelings get hot again this week.
1. The Time-Out Signal
Either girl can say: "Let's take a 10-minute pause before we say something we regret."
2. Get Adult Support
If talking one-on-one feels stuck, we will approach our trusted adult together.
3. Two-Day Check-in
We will meet for 3 minutes on Friday to celebrate our progress.
Signatures of Respect
Student A
Student B
Complete the cycle with an agreed handshake, fist-bump, or kind smile. Page 2 of 2
