Finding Your Calm Slides
Finding Your Calm
anger scenarios and how to cope with them
The Anger "Heat"
Anger is like a fire. It starts small, but it can grow fast if we don't notice it.
"It is okay to feel angry. It is what we DO with that anger that counts."
Check Your Temperature:
- Level 1: Cool & Calm
- Level 2: Warm & Annoyed
- Level 3: Hot & Frustrated
- Level 4: Boiling Point
When the Answer is "NO"
The Scenario:
Your teacher tells you that you cannot go to the library right now, or says you have to finish your math first.
The Urge:
"I want to run out of the room. I want to elope and just get away."
Why do we want to run?
- Feeling trapped
- Feeling unheard
- Needing space
Better Choices Than Running
EBSS Room
Ask: "I need to go to the EBSS room to reset."
Take 5
Ask: "Can I take a 5-minute break at my desk?"
Grounding
Try the 5-4-3-2-1 technique before moving.
Conflict with Friends
The Scenario:
A friend says something you don't like, or leaves you out of a game. You feel a surge of heat in your chest.
The Urge:
"I want to yell at them. I want to say something mean so they feel as bad as I do."
Before You Yell...
Stop and breathe for 3 seconds.
Think of 3 favorite things (cats, hobbies).
Cool Communication
Use an "I Statement"
Step 1
"I feel..."
(angry, left out)
Step 2
"When you..."
(said that, did that)
Step 3
"I need..."
(a break, an apology)
"Yelling shuts people's ears. 'I Statements' open them."
When Things Go Wrong
The Scenario:
You lose a game, you make a mistake on your work, or someone else gets something you wanted.
The Urge:
"I want to hit something, kick my chair, or throw my pencil."
Stop!
Physical aggression makes the problem bigger. It can hurt people or the things you like.
Safe Energy Releases
Draw or Journal
"Scribble the anger onto paper until the heat fades."
Regulate Senses
"Use a stress ball or weighted blanket to ground your body."
Ask for Help:
"I'm feeling really frustrated and I need a different job to do right now."
Home Harmony
The Scenario:
Your parent says "no" to more screen time, or tells you it's time to clean your room.
The Urge:
"I want to slam my door, yell back, or run away from the house."
Think First...
When we yell at home, it can make our parents feel unsafe or disrespected. This usually leads to more "nos" later on.
Cozy Coping at Home
Pet Your Cats
Animals have a calming energy that lowers your heart rate.
Read or Doodle
Escape into a story or drawing instead of the house.
Listen to Music
Use headphones and let the music regulate your senses.
Breathe it Out
Try "Box Breathing" to calm your body and mind.
Understanding the Risks
Physical Aggression
- Hurting students, adults, or yourself
- Damaging property (breaking things)
- Hurting trust and relationships
- Police involvement may happen
Elopement (Running Away)
- Traffic and dangerous cars
- Strangers with bad intentions
- Getting lost and being alone
The 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Tool
5
Sights
Find 5 things you can see.
4
Feels
Find 4 things you can touch.
3
Sounds
Find 3 things you can hear.
2
Smells
Find 2 things you can smell.
1
Taste
Find 1 thing you can taste.
What would your life look like if you were able to manage your anger appropriately?
Take a moment to dream big.
Remember to use your coping skills
You are in control of your choices.
Stay Grounded
Speak Calmly
Choose Kindness
Finding Your Calm Teacher Guide
Finding Your Calm Teacher Guide
Facilitating the Anger Management Presentation
Lesson Overview
This presentation is designed for a student who struggles with "No" or directives, leading to elopement, verbal outbursts, or physical aggression. The goal is to acknowledge the biological "heat" of anger while providing specific, pre-taught replacement behaviors.
Student Profile Note:
Appropriate for a 6th-grade student in a behavior program. Use the calming visual theme to maintain a non-confrontational atmosphere during instruction.
Presentation Talk Track
Slides 1-2: Normalizing Anger
Focus: Validating that anger is a normal emotion. Use the "Thermometer" to help her identify her current state before starting the scenarios.
Prompt: "Where are you on the thermometer right now? Where are you usually when someone tells you 'no'?"
Slides 3-4: The Urge to Elope
Focus: Connecting the feeling of being told "No" to the physical urge to run. Emphasize that the EBSS Room and Break Cards are the safe versions of eloping.
Slides 5-8: Peer Conflict & Physical Urges
Focus: Impulse control. Practicing "I Statements" and safe energy releases (drawing/stress balls). Remind her that stopping the urge before it starts is key.
Slides 9-10: Home Connection
Focus: Generalization. Discuss her cats and hobbies. Encourage her to share her coping plan with her parents.
Slide 11: Real World Risks
Focus: Consequences of high-intensity behavior. This is a serious slide but should be delivered with care.
- Physical Aggression: Discuss how hitting/throwing hurts others, breaks expensive property, and can lead to police involvement if property or people are severely impacted.
- Elopement: Highlight outside dangers. Ask: "What happens if you run into a street with cars? What if you meet a stranger who doesn't have your safety in mind?"
Slides 12-13: Grounding & Dreaming
Slide 12: Practice the 5-4-3-2-1 technique together. Make it interactive by finding things in the room.
Slide 13: The Magical Question. This is the climax of the session. Give her 1-2 minutes to think. Ask her to describe her day without any "incidents."
"What would be different? Would you have more time for cats? More trust from teachers? More screen time?"
Next Steps & Reinforcement
