Clash Control Slides CLASH CONTROL
Mastering the Art of Staying Cool
What is Conflict?
The Reality
Conflict is a normal part of being human. It happens whenever two people have different ideas, needs, or feelings at the same time.
The Goal
The goal isn't to never have conflict. The goal is to handle it without losing your cool or quitting the activity.
The Heat Check
Notice the signs before the "explosion"
Level 1: Chill
"I'm calm and focused."
Level 2: Annoyed
"I'm starting to feel tight or frustrated."
Level 3: Angry
"My heart is racing. I want to yell."
Level 4: Explosion
"I've lost control."
The Secret: Catch it at Level 2 or 3!
Your Clash Toolkit
1
Deep Breathing
Box breathing: In for 4, hold for 4, out for 4, hold for 4.
2
Taking Space
Ask for 2 minutes to cool down before responding.
3
"I" Statements
"I feel frustrated when... because... I need..."
4
Adult Support
If it's too big to handle, ask a teacher for help.
Roleplay Challenge
The Group Project Glitch
"Your partner is playing games on their Chromebook instead of helping with the slides. You're starting to feel Level 3 Heat."
Don't...
Slam your laptop or yell "You're so lazy!"
Instead...
Use an "I" statement or take 3 deep breaths.
Stay in the Game
The ultimate win is being able to handle the conflict and then get back to work.
Finish your part of the task.
Stay in the classroom.
Keep your head up and focus.
Mission Checklist
Now, let's open your Conflict Crusher Worksheets and build your personal battle plan.
Clash Control Facilitator Guide CLASH CONTROL
Facilitator Guide: De-escalation & Engagement
Teacher Resource
Learning Objective
Students will identify personal conflict triggers and internal "heat levels," selecting and practicing at least three de-escalation strategies (deep breathing, space, "I" statements, or adult support) to remain calm and engaged during peer disagreements.
Materials Needed
Clash Control Slides
Conflict Crusher Worksheet
IEP Goal Tracker
Writing Utensils
IEP Goal Focus
"By 1/21/2027, the student will independently apply an appropriate coping strategy... to respond in a calm/respectful manner and remain engaged in the activity in 4 out of 5 observed opportunities."
Instructional Steps
1
Introduction & Heat Check (10 mins)
Display Slides 1-3. Define conflict as natural and neutral. Use Slide 3 to help the student identify physical signs of "heating up" (Level 2/3). Ask: "Where do you feel anger in your body? In your chest, hands, or head?"
2
Toolkit Exploration (10 mins)
Review Slide 4. Model each strategy: Demonstrate "Box Breathing," practice a neutral "I need a 2-minute break" request, and draft a practice "I" statement (e.g., "I feel ignored when you talk over me").
3
Guided Practice (15 mins)
Use Slide 5 to roleplay the group project scenario. Have the student use the Conflict Crusher Worksheet to map out their preferred strategies. Emphasize the "Remaining Engaged" component from Slide 6.
4
Assessment & Tracking (10 mins)
Review the IEP Goal Tracker scenarios. Discuss the difference between "Acceptable" and "Unacceptable" responses. Set a goal for the upcoming week for staff observation.
Discussion Deep-Dive
On Identify Triggers:
"Everyone has things that 'bug' them more than others. What are three things a classmate might do that would immediately push you to Level 2?"
On "I" Statements:
"Why do you think saying 'You are annoying' starts more fights than saying 'I feel annoyed when the volume is loud'?"
On Staying Engaged:
"If you take a 2-minute break, what is the best way to tell your teacher you are ready to come back to the activity?"
Differentiation Tips
• Provide a pre-written "Break Card" for students who struggle with verbalizing the need for space.
• Use a visual "Heat Meter" on the student's desk to help them non-verbally communicate their level to staff.
Common Hurdles
• "It feels weak to back down": Frame de-escalation as a "Pro Move" for high emotional intelligence.
• "They won't listen anyway": Focus on the student's control over their own grade and reputation, regardless of the peer.
Clash Control Worksheet CONFLICT CRUSHER
Personal Mission Plan
Agent Name:
Mission Date:
Phase 1: The Radar
What are the "Triggers" that push your heat level to 2 or 3? Check all that apply or add your own.
Someone touching my stuff
Being told "No" by a teacher
Partner not doing their work
Someone laughing at me
Other: __________________________________________________________________
Phase 2: Tactical Gear
Rank your top 3 strategies for when you feel your heat rising (1 = Most Likely to Use).
Deep Breathing: Taking 3-5 slow breaths before I say a single word.
Taking Space: Stepping to a designated "cool down" area for 2-5 minutes.
"I" Statement: Telling the peer clearly how I feel without blaming them.
Adult Support: Asking a nearby adult to help mediate the conversation.
Phase 3: The Comm Script
Practice writing an "I" statement for a common conflict:
"I feel
when
because
I need ."
Phase 4: Stay in the Game
After you cool down, how will you stay engaged in the lesson or activity?
Clash Control Goal Tracker CLASH CONTROL TRACKER
IEP Goal Data Collection & Assessment
Target Date
1/21/2027
Goal Mastery
4/5 (80%)
IEP Goal Statement
"When faced with peer conflict or disagreement in the classroom or school setting, the student will independently apply an appropriate coping strategy (e.g., deep breathing, taking space, using 'I' statements, or seeking adult support) to respond in a calm and respectful manner and remain engaged in the activity in 4 out of 5 observed opportunities."
Standardized Scenarios & Key
Scenario 1: The Group Slide Edit
"A peer deletes a slide you worked on for 20 minutes because they think it looks 'boring'."
Acceptable Response Use an "I" statement: "I feel frustrated when you delete my work without asking because I spent a lot of time on it. Can we look at the version history together?"
Unacceptable Response Deleting the peer's work in revenge, closing the laptop and refusing to finish the project, or calling the peer a name.
Scenario 2: The Hallway Bump
"While walking to your next class, a peer bumps into you hard. They don't apologize and keep walking."
Acceptable Response Deep breathing (Box breathing) for 30 seconds while walking to class; reporting the incident to a teacher once safely inside the classroom.
Unacceptable Response Shoving the peer back, shouting "Watch where you're going!", or stopping in the hallway to start an argument.
Scenario 3: The PE Loss
"Your team loses a game in PE because a peer made a 'dumb' mistake. Some other kids are laughing about it."
Acceptable Response Requesting "Space" by moving to the bleachers for 2 minutes to cool down, then returning for the next drill or activity.
Unacceptable Response Yelling at the peer who made the mistake, throwing the PE equipment, or sitting out for the rest of the period without permission.
Continued on next page...
Scenario 4: The Lunch Seat
"You go to sit in your usual lunch spot, but a classmate says, 'This seat is saved for someone else,' even though there's no one there."
Acceptable Response "Okay, thanks for letting me know," then finding another seat and continuing to eat lunch with other peers or quietly.
Unacceptable Response Arguing about who "owns" the seat, knocking the peer's lunch tray, or getting angry and refusing to eat lunch.
Scenario 5: The Science Lab Dispute
"During a lab, your partner keeps taking the tools out of your hands and doing all the work themselves."
Acceptable Response Seeking Adult Support: "Mr. Science, we're having trouble splitting the work. Can you help us decide who does which step?"
Response Reset Facilitator Guide Response Reset
Facilitator Guide
Duration
15 MIN
Objective
Students will identify the "Retaliation Impulse" (the urge to 'get back' at someone) and practice immediately replacing it with a healthy coping strategy to avoid escalation.
Materials Needed
Response Reset Slides
Response Reset Scenario Sort
Response Reset Goal Tracker
Rapid Pacing Guide
02
The Retaliation Trap
"When someone bumps you or says something mean, what's the very first thought that pops into your head?"
Identify that first impulse (e.g., "I'm gonna hit them back," "I'll say something meaner"). Explain that this is the Retaliation Trap —it feels like winning, but it's actually losing control.
05
Impulse vs. Reset
Show Slide 3. Contrast the Impulse (Short-term satisfaction, long-term trouble) with the Reset (Healthy coping skills already mastered).
Facilitator Script:
"We know you know the skills (deep breaths, walking away). The challenge isn't the skill—it's the Reset . We have to pause the impulse to choose the skill."
05
Scenario Sprint
Use the Scenario Sort worksheet. Read a scenario. Ask the student for the Retaliation Impulse first, then force the Reset.
Example: "Someone takes your pencil. Impulse? [Break theirs]. Reset? [Ask for it back/Tell teacher]."
03
Data & Debrief
Complete the Goal Tracker based on today's performance. Focus on the student's ability to vocalize the difference between the urge and the choice.
Commander's Tips
Don't shame the impulse. Acknowledge that the urge to retaliate is natural, but acting on it is optional.
Keep it fast-paced. The 15-minute format mimics the speed of a real conflict where decisions happen in seconds.
Response Reset Slides Response Reset
15-Minute Intervention
The Retaliation Trap
The Impulse
Feeling like you have to "get back" at them.
Doing something mean because they were mean.
Feeling like it makes things "even."
Why is it a trap?
It doesn't end the conflict. It just makes the conflict BIGGER and gets YOU in trouble too.
"When you retaliate, you give them control of your day."
The 3-Second Reset
1
Feel the Urge
Notice that feeling in your chest or hands that wants to hit back or yell.
2
Call It Out
"That's just a retaliation impulse. I'm choosing a reset instead."
3
Use a Tool
Deep breath, walk away, or use an 'I' Statement. The skill you already know.
Scenario Sprint
Rapid Response Practice
!
The Situation
Someone bumps into you in the hallway on purpose and laughs.
"The first thought is the impulse. The second thought is the power."
The Impulse (Trap)
"Push them back harder so they know I'm not weak."
The Reset (Choice)
Take a breath, keep walking, and tell a teacher later.
Mission Complete
You have the tools. You have the skills. Now you have the RESET .
Next Step: Data Tracking
Response Reset Scenario Sort Scenario Sort
Response Reset Mission
Name:
Date:
Mission Briefing
For each scenario, identify the Retaliation Impulse (what your brain first wants to do to "get back" at them) and the Healthy Reset (the skill you choose to keep yourself out of trouble).
Scenario 01 HALLWAY
"A peer calls you a 'loser' in front of your friends."
Retaliation Impulse
Healthy Reset
Scenario 02 CLASSROOM
"Someone takes your seat while you are getting a tissue."
Retaliation Impulse
Healthy Reset
Scenario 03 LUNCHROOM
"A peer cuts in front of you in the lunch line."
Retaliation Impulse
Healthy Reset
Commander's Log
Why is it important to wait 3 seconds before responding to an impulse?
Response Reset Goal Tracker IEP Goal Tracker
Response Reset: Retaliation Mastery
Student:
Date:
Target IEP Goal
"Identify the initial retaliatory impulse and independently select a healthy coping strategy in 4 out of 5 trials."
Trial Scenario Prompt Impulse ID'd Reset Chosen Performance Notes 1 Peer rolls eyes and sighs while student shares an idea
| ______________________________________ |
| 2 | Peer "accidentally" swiping student's binder off the desk |
|
| ______________________________________ |
| 3 | Peer says "Shut up" during class |
|
| ______________________________________ |
| 4 | Student loses a game/competition |
|
| ______________________________________ |
| 5 | Peer laughs at student mistake |
|
| ______________________________________ |
Impulse Accuracy _____ / 5
Reset Choice _____ / 5
Mastery Met? YES / NO
Observations & Anecdotal Data
Natural Environment (Spontaneous Behavior):
Specific Barriers & Next Steps:
Peace Pilot Slides MISSION BRIEFING 03
Peace Pilot
Navigating classroom conflict and staying on course for success.
Mission Objective
When a disagreement happens, a Peace Pilot responds calmly, solves the problem, and remains engaged in the mission.
Mission Success
The problem is handled and you stay on task.
Mission Failure
Conflict stops the work and grounds the plane.
Your Coping Toolkit
Deep Breathing
Stabilize your engine before you speak.
Taking Space
Solo flight for 2 mins to cool the cockpit.
"I" Statements
Clear radio: "I feel... when you..."
Adult Support
Radio Tower when clouds are too thick.
The 4-Step Navigation
01
Identify
Define the problem neutrally.
02
Scan
Check 3 possible flight routes.
03
Apply Tool
Use your Coping Toolkit!
04
Land & Engage
Solve and stay in the game.
Skyway Showdown: Round 01
LEVEL: CLASSROOM
"A group member says your idea for the science poster is 'boring' and deletes your part of the digital work."
Option A
Deep Breath + "I" Statement
Option B
Take Space + Adult Support
Skyway Showdown: Round 02
LEVEL: HALLWAY
"A student bumps into you hard in the hallway and says 'Watch where you're going, loser!'"
Critical Maneuver
Choose a tool to keep your cool and remain engaged in your mission (getting to class).
Mission Debrief
Every successful landing needs a report. We don't just solve it—we log it and learn from it.
Peace Pilot Facilitator Guide Peace Pilot
Operations Guide // Lesson 3
Command Tower
Target Objective
"When faced with peer conflict, students will independently apply coping strategies (deep breathing, space, I-statements, seeking support) to respond calmly and remain engaged in the activity."
Flight Gear
IEP Aligned Slides
Log & Self-Report
30-Min Rapid Mission
Mission Sequence
01
Toolkit Briefing (7 mins)
Review the 4 primary coping tools: Deep Breathing, Taking Space, "I" Statements, and Adult Support. Emphasize that these tools help "calm the cockpit" so you can stay in the game.
02
Navigation Theory (5 mins)
Introduce the 4 steps: Identify, Scan, Apply Tool, Land & Engage. The goal isn't just to solve the problem, but to keep the mission (the activity) moving.
03
Game: Skyway Showdown (13 mins)
Read scenarios from the slides. Pairs must select the Correct Tool and explain how they would Remain Engaged.
"Example: I use an I-statement to tell my partner I'm frustrated, then I immediately go back to working on my part of the project."
04
Self-Report Training (5 mins)
Explain how to use the Flight Log Self-Report . Pilots have to be honest with themselves about their performance to earn their wings.
Mission 03 Ops // Peace Pilot Guide
Page 1 of 1
Peace Pilot Flight Log Peace Pilot Flight Log
Mission Briefing // Module 03
Goal Target
1/21/2027
Pilot Name:
Mission Date:
Skyway Showdown Training
"Scenario 01: A group member deletes your part of the digital science poster."
1. Pick Your Toolkit Tool:
Breathing
Space
"I" Statement
Adult Help
2. The Safe Landing (Plan):
"Scenario 02: A student bumps you in the hall and says 'Watch where you're going, loser!'"
1. Pick Tool:
2. How will you stay ENGAGED in your goal?
Pilot's Self-Report (Classroom Log)
Log 3 times this week you navigated a conflict successfully.
The Clouds (Incident) Used Tool? Stayed Engaged? Y / N Y / N Y / N Y / N
End of Rapid Flight Mission // Log ID: PP-Goal-2027
Peace Pilot Goal Tracker Mission Assessment Log
Peace Pilot Goal Tracker // 2027 Objective
Measurement
4 out of 5 Trials
Pilot (Student)
Staff Observer
Acceptable Toolkit Strategies
Deep Breathing
Taking Space
"I" Statements
Adult Support
Independent Trial Assessments
Trial Incident / Scenario Tool Used Calm? Engaged? Score 1 Peer takes materials without asking... Y / N Y / N +/- 2 Group disagreement on project direction... Y / N Y / N +/- 3 Peer makes distracting noise in class... Y / N Y / N +/- 4 Losing a game or competition at recess... Y / N Y / N +/- 5 Bumping/teasing in unstructured space... Y / N Y / N +/-
Scoring: (+) Independent Success (P) Prompted Success (-) Error / Refusal
Goal Mastery: 4/5 Independence
Progress Tracking // Mission PP-Goal-2027 Observer Signature: _______________________
Peace Pilot Facilitation Page Peace Pilot
Facilitation Reference // Lesson 03
Vocal Script
The Mission Briefing (5 mins)
Talking Points:
"Alright pilots, listen up. Today we’re facing 'Mayday Clouds'—moments when a peer says something that makes your engine run hot. In this classroom, we don't eject. We navigate. A Peace Pilot handles the heat, uses their toolkit, and stays focused on the mission. If a conflict grounds you, the mission fails. If you land it safely, you stay engaged and you win."
The Toolkit Breakdown (10 mins)
1. Deep Breathing
"I see smoke in the cockpit. I'll take 3 slow breaths to clear the air."
2. Taking Space
"I'm stepping away for 2 mins to cool my engine so I don't say something I regret."
3. "I" Statements
"I feel frustrated when you delete my work because I put time into it."
4. Adult Support
"Tower, I need a mediator. We've hit a block and I need help navigating."
Skyway Showdown (15 mins)
Facilitator Pro-Tips:
Speed: Give students 15 seconds to choose a tool. Conflict happens fast!
Roleplay: If they choose an I-statement, have them say it aloud. Check tone.
Engagement: Always ask: "Now that you used your tool, how do you get back to work?"
Peace Pilot Facilitation Page // Conflict Commanders
Module 03 // Single Page Reference
Thought Tamer Slides THOUGHT TAMER
The Mind Mechanic's Guide
The ABC Engine
A
ACTIVATING EVENT
"What just happened?"
A peer bumps you, or a teacher corrects you.
B
BELIEF (THOUGHT)
"What am I thinking?"
"They did that on purpose!" or "I'm so stupid."
C
CONSEQUENCE
"How do I feel/act?"
Anger, yelling, quitting the activity.
"The Secret: It's NOT 'A' that causes 'C'. It's YOUR 'B'!"
Thinking Traps
The Awful-izer
"This is the WORST thing ever! My whole day is ruined."
Causes: High Heat
The Mind-Reader
"I know they are laughing at me. They want me to fail."
Causes: Suspicion
The Fork in the Road
One thought leads to a storm. One leads to calm.
ESCALATE
The Faulty Path:
"I'm going to show them they can't mess with me!"
Result: Office Referral
DE-ESCALATE
The Repair Path:
"It might have been an accident. I can stay cool."
Result: Keep Your Recess
The Self-Talk Switch
Toxic Thought
Mechanic's Choice
"This is impossible. I can't do this."
"It's hard, but I can ask for help."
"They hate me. That's why they said that."
"I don't know why they said that. I'll stay calm."
Lab Practice
The Cafeteria Chaos
Activating Event:
"A peer cuts right in front of you in the lunch line and laughs."
Escalate
Shove them back
De-escalate
Use Self-Talk
Mechanic's Move:
1
Name the emotion: "I'm feeling annoyed."
2
Switch the thought: "Cutting is rude, but it's not worth getting in trouble for."
3
Act: "Ignore them or tell an adult calmly."
System Ready
You are the mechanic of your own mind. When thoughts break, you have the tools to fix them.
Let's work on the Blueprint Activity!
Thought Tamer Facilitator Guide Thought Tamer Manual
Mind Mechanic's Guide to REBT & Self-Talk
Facilitator Script
Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy (REBT)
This lesson uses the ABC Model to show students that their emotional "Consequences" (C) are not caused by the external "Activating Event" (A), but by their internal "Beliefs" (B). By changing the belief through positive self-talk, they can choose a different emotional consequence.
Learning Objective
"Student will identify emotional states and utilize positive self-talk to de-escalate thoughts during conflict, as part of their IEP goal mastery."
Key Vocabulary
Activating Event: The trigger or situation.
Thinking Traps: Irrational thoughts that exaggerate the situation.
Self-Talk: The internal coach speaking inside your head.
Escalation: Increasing the intensity of conflict.
The Repair Schedule
1
The ABC Engine (Slides 1-2)
Facilitator Prompt: "Today we're mind mechanics. If your engine is smoking, you have to look under the hood. Most people think someone bumping them makes them angry. But it's actually what they think about the bump that causes the anger."
Key Point: Draw a diagram of A -> B -> C. Emphasize that 'B' is the only part we can change in the moment.
2
Spotting Broken Parts (Slide 3)
Review the "Thinking Traps." Ask the student which one they fall into most.
3
The Switch (Slides 4-6)
Discuss the "Fork in the Road." If we follow the "Mind-Reader" trap, we Escalate. If we use the "Self-Talk Switch," we De-escalate.
Practice: "I'm going to say a toxic thought, and you tell me the 'Mechanic's Choice' self-talk to fix it."
Counselor Discussion Prompts
On Escalation Choice:
"When you choose to yell back, what are you 'winning'? What are you 'losing'? Is the trade-off worth it?"
On Self-Talk:
"Imagine your best friend is having this problem. What would you tell them? Can you say that same thing to yourself?"
IEP Progress Note Tips
01 Note if the student identified their "B" (thought) independently or required prompts.
02 Record the specific self-talk phrase they preferred (e.g., "I can handle this").
03 Track whether the student could identify their physical emotional state (e.g., "I feel tight in my chest").
Roleplay Scenarios
Thought Tamer Blueprint Activity Mechanic's Blueprint
Phase 2: Thought Calibration
Mechanic:
System Date:
A
Activating Event Map
Think of a time this week when you felt angry or upset. What happened?
Example: A peer cut in line at the cafeteria.
B
Thinking Traps (Check One)
Which "Broken Part" was in your engine? What thought were you having?
The Awful-izer "This is a disaster!"
The Mind-Reader "They hate me!"
The Self-Talk Switch
Transform your toxic thought into a Mechanic's Choice thought.
Toxic Thought
"They're all against me."
Mechanic's Choice
"I only know my own feelings. I'll stay calm."
Write a toxic thought here:
Fix it with Self-Talk:
Internal Sensor Check
When you feel "Thinking Traps," what happens in your body? (Example: Fast heart, hot face, tight fists)
Thought Tamer Goal Tracker Thought Tamer Tracker
IEP Goal Data & Case Scenarios
Target Mastery
4/5 (80%)
Setting
Gen Ed / Unstructured
IEP Goal Focus
"When given real-life school-based situations that may cause emotional dysregulation, he will independently identify his emotional state and implement a previously learned coping strategy (e.g., deep breathing, taking a break, positive self-talk) in general education and unstructured settings in 4 out of 5 observed instances, with no more than one adult prompt..."
REBT Calibration Scenarios
Scenario 1: The Hallway Shove Unstructured
"During class change, someone bumps you hard into the lockers. You drop your books. The peer keeps walking without looking back."
Acceptable Responses
Identity: "I feel angry/shocked."
Strategy: Positive self-talk ("It was probably an accident; I'm not going to ruin my day over a bump") + deep breathing.
Unacceptable Responses Shouting a name at the peer, chasing them down, or slamming lockers in frustration.
Scenario 2: The Lunch Table Joke Unstructured
"A group of peers at your table starts laughing and looking at your shoes. One says, 'Did you get those from the lost and found?'"
Acceptable Responses
Identity: "I feel embarrassed/annoyed."
Strategy: Taking a break (moving to a different table) or self-talk ("Their opinion doesn't define me; I like my shoes").
Unacceptable Responses Flipping the table, insulting the peer back, or yelling "Shut up!" loudly.
Scenario 3: The Group Takeover Gen Ed Classroom
"During science lab, your partner keeps grabbing the materials and won't let you do any of the experiment steps."
Acceptable Responses
Identity: "I feel frustrated/invisible."
Strategy: Using an "I" statement calmly OR positive self-talk ("I'll stay calm and ask the teacher for a specific job") + deep breathing.
Unacceptable Responses Pushing the partner's hand away, walking out of class, or putting your head down and refusing to work.
Scenario 4: The Teacher Correction Gen Ed Classroom
"The teacher calls you out in front of the whole class for talking, but you weren't the one talking—it was the person behind you."
Acceptable Responses
Identity: "I feel defensive/frustrated."
Strategy: Positive self-talk ("The teacher made a mistake; I can talk to them after class privately") + taking a 1-minute desk break.
Unacceptable Responses Arguing loudly with the teacher, pointing at the other student aggressively, or rolling eyes and scoffing.
