Social Signal Flowchart v2 Social Signal Flowchart
Case: "Are they mad at me?"
AGENT: _____________________
DATE: ______________________
Intensity Check (1-10)
1: WHISPER 5: LOUD 10: SCREAMING
Impact (High/Low)
Record here
The Thought Alert
"Someone is mad at me or I did something to upset them."
1. Evidence Check
Do you have concrete, physical proof (e.g., they told you, they sent a mean text, they walked away when you said hello)?
YES
NO
Real Social Signal
This might be a real conflict. Take 10 minutes to breathe, then use your "Repair Script."
"Hey, I felt like [Action] meant you were upset. Did I do something wrong?"
False Alarm / OCD Signal
If there's no proof, your OCD is playing a "What If" game . Move to the logic check.
2. The "Human Factor" Check
Could they just be tired, hungry, busy, or stressed about something else entirely?
Likely Truth: People usually think about themselves way more than they think about us!
The Mindset Shift
1
Label It
Say: "This is a feeling, not a fact."
2
20-Minute Rule
Wait 20 mins before asking for reassurance.
3
Assume Best
No news is good news. Assume they're okay.
4
Accept 'Maybe'
"Maybe they're mad. I can handle it later."
Thought Detective Tool Stay Curious, Not Certain
Moral Compass Flowchart v2 Moral Compass Flowchart
Case: "Am I a terrible person?"
AGENT: _____________________
DATE: ______________________
Guilt Intensity (1-10)
1: MISTAKE 5: HEAVY 10: CRUSHING
Impact (High/Low)
Record here
The Intrusive Thought
"I had a bad thought. Does that make me a bad person?"
1. Action Check
Did you actually do something to hurt someone on purpose?
YES
NO
Normal Mistake
If you did something wrong, apologize and move on. Everyone makes mistakes. It doesn't define you.
"I'm sorry I did [Action]. How can I make it right?"
Scrupulosity Loop
A thought is NOT an action. Bad people don't worry about being bad—only good people do!
2. The Value Check
Is the thought the *opposite* of what you truly value?
If you hate the thought, it means your character is strong. OCD attacks what you love most.
The Moral Defense Plan
1
Brain Junk
Thoughts are just random noise. Trash them.
2
No Confessing
Resist telling others to "feel clean."
3
Actions Count
Judge yourself by what you DO, not think.
4
Accept 'Maybe'
"Maybe I'm bad. I can live with that today."
Thought Detective Tool Values > Thoughts
Social Signal Guide Signal Investigator Guide
Case: "Are they mad at me?"
The "Brain Glitch"
OCD causes your brain's "danger detector" to overreact. It treats a friend's silence like a red alert. This is called a Cognitive Distortion .
Evidence vs. Emotion
FACTS (Detective Mode):
They explicitly said "I'm upset."
They didn't reply to a direct question.
They left you out of a specific event.
FEELINGS (OCD Mode):
"I just have a bad feeling in my stomach."
"They looked at me in a weird way."
"I'm sure they're thinking something mean."
Emergency Tactics
1. The "So What?" Strategy
Challenge the fear. "If they ARE mad, I can handle it. I don't need to fix it this second."
2. Sensory Grounding
Focus on 5 things you see, 4 you touch, 3 you hear. Get out of your head and into the room.
3. The 30-Minute Fast
Commit to NOT asking "Are we okay?" for 30 minutes. Watch the anxiety peak and then drop.
Thought Intensity Tracker
1-2: PEST
3-4: GUEST
5-6: SHOUTER
7-8: BULLY
9-10: 🚨
Investigator Notes
Write down what happened and what you learned here...
Moral Compass Guide Moral Reality Guide
Case: "Am I a terrible person?"
The "Thought-Action" Trap
OCD tries to convince you that Thinking something is the same as Doing it . This is a common lie. Everyone has random, "bad" thoughts. The difference is that you care, which proves your goodness.
Why You Aren't "Terrible"
Bad people don't spend hours worrying if they are bad. They don't have "guilt loops."
Brain Junk: Thoughts are like pop-up ads. You don't choose them, and they don't reflect your character.
The "Maybe" Strategy
When OCD demands a "Yes or No" answer, don't give it one. Use Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) :
"Maybe I am a terrible person. Maybe I'm not. I'm going to eat lunch anyway."
By refusing to argue, you starve the OCD of the attention it needs to grow.
The "Reset" Protocol
1: Stop Confessing: Don't try to prove your innocence to others.
2: Label the Loop: "This is my scrupulosity talking, not my soul."
3: Values > Thoughts: Do one kind thing for yourself right now.
Self-Compassion Check-In
🧘
Safe
🌋
Erupting
Note: It's okay to feel "Erupting." Just remember: you are not your thoughts.
My Evidence of Goodness
List 3 things you DID today that align with your values (not what you thought!):
Social Signal Flowchart BW Social Signal Flowchart
Case: "Are they mad at me?"
AGENT: _____________________
DATE: ______________________
Intensity Check (1-10)
1: WHISPER 5: LOUD 10: SCREAMING
Impact (High/Low)
Record Here
The Thought Alert
"Someone is mad at me or I did something to upset them."
1. Evidence Check
Do you have concrete, physical proof (e.g., they told you, they sent a mean text, they walked away)?
YES
NO
Real Social Signal
This might be a real conflict. Take 10 minutes to breathe, then use your "Repair Script."
"Hey, I felt like [Action] meant you were upset. Did I do something wrong?"
False Alarm / OCD Signal
If there's no proof, your OCD is playing a "What If" game . Move to the logic check.
2. The "Human Factor" Check
Could they just be tired, hungry, busy, or stressed about something else?
"Most people are thinking about their own day, not judging yours!"
The Mindset Shift
1
Label It
Say: "This is a feeling, not a fact."
2
20-Minute Rule
Wait 20 mins before asking for reassurance.
3
Assume Best
No news is good news. Assume they're okay.
4
Accept 'Maybe'
"Maybe they're mad. I can handle that later."
Thought Detective Tool • Black & White Edition Stay Curious, Not Certain
Moral Compass Flowchart BW Moral Compass Flowchart
Case: "Am I a terrible person?"
AGENT: _____________________
DATE: ______________________
Guilt Intensity (1-10)
1: MISTAKE 5: HEAVY 10: CRUSHING
Impact (High/Low)
Record Here
The Intrusive Thought
"I had a bad thought. Does that make me a bad person?"
1. Action Check
Did you actually do something to hurt someone on purpose?
YES
NO
Normal Mistake
If you did something wrong, apologize and move on. Everyone makes mistakes. It doesn't define your soul.
"I'm sorry I did [Action]. How can I make it right?"
Scrupulosity Loop
A thought is NOT an action. Bad people don't worry about being bad—only good people do!
2. The Value Check
Is the thought the *opposite* of what you truly value?
"If you hate the thought, it means your character is strong. OCD attacks what you love."
The Moral Defense Plan
1
Brain Junk
Thoughts are electrical noise. Trash them.
2
No Confessing
Don't try to "feel clean" by telling.
3
Actions Count
Judge yourself by what you DO, not think.
4
Accept 'Maybe'
"Maybe I'm bad. I can live with it."
Thought Detective Tool • Black & White Edition Values > Thoughts
Social Signal Guide BW Signal Investigator Guide
Case: "Are they mad at me?"
The "Brain Glitch"
OCD causes your brain's "danger detector" to overreact. It treats a friend's silence like a red alert. This is a Cognitive Distortion .
Evidence vs. Emotion
FACTS (Detective Mode):
They explicitly said "I'm upset."
They didn't reply to a direct question.
They left you out of a specific event.
FEELINGS (OCD Mode):
"I just have a bad feeling in my stomach."
"They looked at me in a weird way."
"I'm sure they're thinking something mean."
Emergency Tactics
1. The "So What?" Strategy
"If they ARE mad, I can handle it. I don't need to fix it this second."
2. Sensory Grounding
Focus on 5 things you see, 4 you touch, 3 you hear. Get out of your head.
3. The 30-Minute Fast
Commit to NOT asking "Are we okay?" for 30 minutes. Watch the anxiety drop.
Thought Intensity Tracker
1-2: Pest
3-4: Guest
5-6: Shouter
7-8: Bully
9-10: Alarm
Investigator Notes
Write down what happened and what you learned here...
Moral Compass Guide BW Moral Reality Guide
Case: "Am I a terrible person?"
The "Thought-Action" Trap
OCD tries to convince you that Thinking something is the same as Doing it . This is a lie. Everyone has random, "bad" thoughts. The difference is that you care.
Why You Aren't "Terrible"
Bad people don't spend hours worrying if they are bad. They don't have "guilt loops."
Brain Junk: Thoughts are like pop-up ads. You don't choose them, and they aren't your character.
The "Maybe" Strategy
When OCD demands a "Yes or No" answer, don't give it one. Use ERP :
"Maybe I am a terrible person. Maybe I'm not. I'm going to eat lunch anyway."
By refusing to argue, you starve the OCD of the attention it needs to grow.
The "Reset" Protocol
1 Stop Confessing: Don't try to prove your innocence to others.
2 Label the Loop: "This is scrupulosity talking, not my soul."
3 Values > Thoughts: Do one kind thing for yourself right now.
Self-Compassion Check-In
🧘
Safe
🌋
Erupting
Note: It's okay to feel "Erupting." Just remember: you are not your thoughts.
My Evidence of Goodness
List 3 things you DID today that align with your values:
01. __________________________________________________________________________
02. __________________________________________________________________________
03. __________________________________________________________________________
